Why your joy needs to be non-negotiable

For much of my life, as a young adult, I was “When I, then I” girl.

When I lose weight, then I will (fill in the blank). When I have the time, when I have the money, when everything is perfect, then I’ll enjoy myself. I kept putting off being joyful because I felt I didn’t deserve it.

We often treat joy as a reward, something we have to earn or prove ourselves worthy of.

Joy is a natural state.
Joy doesn’t need to be earned.
Joy is offered freely and in abundance.

As I write this, my love and I are undergoing significant changes; moving house, changing careers and dealing with aging relatives. There are lots of plot twists to navigate, hurdles to jump and decisions to be made. It feels daunting and could overwhelm us. There’s no quick fix. No magic wand to wave. It’s going to take time, making it even more important to lean into joy.

Becoming intentional about claiming joy is part of the solution.

Joy nourishes us and gives us the fuel to get through the Big Things.

What brings me joy?

Art, dance and music.
Time in nature.
Aspirational people and events.
Fun, travel and adventure.

How about you?

In my Joy Club program, 21% More Joy in 21 Days, I refer to the Framingham Heart Study, which found that a happy person’s positive mood increases their friends’ chances of being happy and this effect extends to friends of friends and even the friends of friends’ friends. Joy is literally contagious! So, prioritising your own joy has a ripple effect that others will benefit from too.

So, whatever you’re planning today, make sure you include joy and make it non-negotiable.